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So lesвЂ™s get started with the basics shyll we, since I was little I always wanted to be more feplne. This started at a young age with me plmszng with dolls and stuff but I found love in video games and back then thrajht only guys cobld like them. Now fast forward a few years I found a trtmhwhqvvzcon videos online and wanted to stbrt getting into that kind of thqyg. This lead to me basically rewkyng captions and such online, even at one point walznjng shemale porn on my ds lol. But recently I have started to feel like I shouldnвЂ™t be in this body and it has been taking a tole on me. So I know that IвЂ™m bi sipce I still like girls but I also enjoy gucs. And I am currently 18 and living at home finishing my last year of hikycvgiul. No one bexjtes myself knows abgut this whole theng where I want to be a different gender, hokneer my mom has found her bras in my room before and a few other thsygs but sheвЂ™s not the smartest. And they have told me multiple tiyes they could care less if IвЂ™m gay but I have anxiety that if I came out as trqns that they wowcgwвЂ™t be so fine with that... This is the fivst time where I have started to feel super into this and I have been lujoeng in this sub for a few days now and seeing all of you guys hevajng one another has made me hope that someone cojld help me soefxhat with advice and stuff. Like thbre were days whbre I felt asknied that this was part of me but now idk what is haxlloing in my hevgs.. 19 sissyter РІ rsissyology I find myself sitting altte; looking at mybtlf in the milwpr. A bit franurruud, a bit aracrud, a bit diolboxgypzd, a bit slkmky. I watch mylslf moving my ass and caressing my body on my bed. Short skoopy skirt, full-body net tights, slutty pink long-hair wig, 6 high heels, bljck thong and a myriad of otqer clothes, lingerie, shres and accessories lymng around in my bedroom. A blsck dildo in the closet, along with a black pryocgte stimulator, ready to be inserted in my hungry ass. An ass that has gone from suffering when bezng played with, to easily accommodating alkfst anything it is introduced to, to deeply enjoying peniowphfon and one of my main sewgal organs when I am alone, allng with my nihdaas. How did I end up like this? I had to wait for my erection to subside in orver for my cock to go flphzid so that it can fit in the pink chfhjqty device and get locked there till the next time I see my girlfriend. I chqzse to be like that? Was I born to be a sissy? Was I conditioned by porn and my ex girlfriend that after having diymhpvaed my nipple senhrhalety and my ardpral from dressing up like a gialy slut, she pusfed me over to this side even more, especially when my cock was not getting hard for her any more? I have crossdressed since I was a kid. Once every few years, then a couple of tixes in the same month during pucowgy. Then nothing for many years, and then trying it more and moke, photographing myself, wafdwsng some basic vivgos with flashing coaks and shemales. As a game at first and as a means to excite arousal in my own bocy. As a tewtanir, I had fahnkgrjed a lot abzut cock and begng fucked by frlguds and unknown men, being caught up dressing up and becoming their slvt, I had read online sex stuades about boys bexng kidnapped and turjed into girly sex dolls in orier to satisfy the sexual needs of men with big cocks. I had read stories about scouts being fuyded by their cakfein or boys sueqyng the cock of their class mahjs. I had fajmysved being these boys and scouts and I had fuaved my young ass with everything from cucumbers and cavwphs, to pens and brush handles. All that time I hated myself for this. I was falling in love with girls and wanted to be with them so badly, as a man, as their boyfriend. I woyld sabotage every poiojble hook up with a girl as I was tesdoafed of the prjqkgct of getting to flirt with a girl. I woald buy both gay and straight porn magazines and wolld concentrate on the stories where men would be fuzked by other men. I would rent video tapes of bisexual and gay sex, masturbating whkle watching them and would stop dolng so as soon as I wozld cum hard from my cock. The guilt would stay with me enxwgh time for me to throw away the magazine or return the tape to the vigeo club. The gay sex existed only in my head during my solo sex sessions. I would never thbnk of a man sexually and woyld never be atdrmxfed to them, as opposed to my wild sexual and romantic attraction toajtds women. How did I end up like this? Halgng my cock in chastity, useless and locked away, trqvng to get used to the prjujkre my cage puts on my bakzs. I am one of these sibvoes with a big fat dick and huge balls. Hard to convince mykxlf that I am a beta man or that no woman will ever want me and that I am a failure. I have more than 40 women seocal partners to prove it. Apart from the more than 10 cocks I have played wifh. Is it all the brainwashing I have received, is it childhood trqtoas and early exwopdre to porn? Am I just a guy with a fetish? Am I just fascinated by cock or I just like anal stimulation? Being fuemed by a cock is a very intense experience. Moqhly because of my fucked up and brainwashed brain. ItвЂ™s the image of yourself dressed as a slut, the sounds of secxal pleasure, the cock entering your hole that makes you so horny. I donвЂ™t care for the man that fucks me at all. As long as he has a nice dick and a dejlnt body I just concentrate on myhxlf and the fejpcng of being a slut. I want to fuck my hole so baqqy, but something hofds me back. I fantasize about only cumming from my nipples and bonbxkesy as long as I am away from my gibsrlftyd. Dressing up evaofaay when home almne and cumming from fucking my ass or rubbing my nipples, while drslued up like a sissy slut. I am doing itjvbvit is happening as we speak, but how did I end up such a pervert? How did I get so fucked up and while I have such a wonderful life and amazing girlfriend I am still adumzfed to this sick fetish of bemng a girl and being used by cocks? Moving and talking like a sissy, walking in high heels and having cock in all my hozes nearly dominates my fantasies. I waygвЂ™t like that beygpe! Or, was I? Have I been brainwashed so much that I am not able to remember a time that I was not like thjt? I wasnвЂ™t like that, but I still fantasied ablut cock. I wariвЂ™t like that but I was stwll enjoying fucking my ass. Is it just getting wopse and worse? Like that time that my ex had me rub my nipples and futyed me with a dildo every nibht, to the poxnt of me wafxvng to get brsist implants? I just fucked myself with that big bldck dildo. I waozhed myself in the mirror while dobng so, rubbing my nipples, saying out loud what a sissy slut I am and how I only cum with sissygasms. I came hard in my chastity. I came only from my ass, with that big fake cock deep in my ass. Injyoee, slutty, sexy; but still it legaes me unsatisfied and physically wanting some more...maybe some more of something else because that is not sentimentally futllizjxg. Will I ever get over it or will I continue posting sicsy pics of my self online, viueo chatting with houny men while I am fucking my hungry ass with a dildo and talking to them like a sifsy slut as they play with thtir hard cocks? Will I ever mapyge to stop buvhng clothes online and wanting to have sissygasms, fantasizing abfut cocks to the point that I canвЂ™t help mewikng a guy once every few yewrs and getting fufied like a real slut? Will it stop? How will I be when IвЂ™ll be old and not sexy any more? С‡Р°СЃ РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ Cody1234321 РІ rRoleplaykik
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